Amy Chua's article seems to have created an uproar. Should one push one's child or just introduce them to new concepts, and let her discover the joys herself?
I consider myself a pretty typical Asian parent. But by Chua's Chinese mom standards, I fall very short.
Oh, I am tough when I want to be. I can be really hard when it comes to putting plates away in the sink, or eating one's food without complaining. I once had little brat stay at the breakfast table till 3pm, skip a birthday party, and finish her cereal.
I don't do it all the time, and when I do, there are enough warnings - but I am no softy. The kids have learned to read my voice. They know when not to mess with me, even if they disagree.
I do push them occasionally - to listen to music that I think they will like, to stick with lessons that may be boring now, to jump a little higher, to eat those onions. I give them a little nudge, tease them that they can't do it (this was fail proof till the older brat started to see through it), and even lecture them sometimes (on how they will thank me later on for not letting them quit). But, I do not dig my heels. Except for cereal.
I do not feel that this is the time for 3 hour piano practice, and pressure to get into Harvard. Success is doing something with your life. Harvard or piano is what helps you get there. Maybe.
My precious brats are just starting to live their lives. There is a long journey ahead of them, and a lot for them to experience. I want them to catch butterflies in the garden, read books that are eminently forgettable, dance in front of the mirror, chase each other around the house, and get bored. Unlike piano, they are not going to be able to do that later (not in the same way, at least), and that, in my book, makes them more important than piano.
It is just how I feel. And, yes, I am a Chinese mom (Indian, actually) - but not the kind that Amy thinks I am.
Over to you.
I consider myself a pretty typical Asian parent. But by Chua's Chinese mom standards, I fall very short.
Oh, I am tough when I want to be. I can be really hard when it comes to putting plates away in the sink, or eating one's food without complaining. I once had little brat stay at the breakfast table till 3pm, skip a birthday party, and finish her cereal.
I don't do it all the time, and when I do, there are enough warnings - but I am no softy. The kids have learned to read my voice. They know when not to mess with me, even if they disagree.
I do push them occasionally - to listen to music that I think they will like, to stick with lessons that may be boring now, to jump a little higher, to eat those onions. I give them a little nudge, tease them that they can't do it (this was fail proof till the older brat started to see through it), and even lecture them sometimes (on how they will thank me later on for not letting them quit). But, I do not dig my heels. Except for cereal.
I do not feel that this is the time for 3 hour piano practice, and pressure to get into Harvard. Success is doing something with your life. Harvard or piano is what helps you get there. Maybe.
My precious brats are just starting to live their lives. There is a long journey ahead of them, and a lot for them to experience. I want them to catch butterflies in the garden, read books that are eminently forgettable, dance in front of the mirror, chase each other around the house, and get bored. Unlike piano, they are not going to be able to do that later (not in the same way, at least), and that, in my book, makes them more important than piano.
It is just how I feel. And, yes, I am a Chinese mom (Indian, actually) - but not the kind that Amy thinks I am.
Over to you.
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